forever if.

Lonesome Dove.

It deserves its own post.

EPICCCCC.

When you came in the air went out

I’m reading Lonesome Dove but because my traitorous fingers slutted it up with Google five minutes ago, I found out that Augustus hung Jake Spoon WAY BEFORE AUGUSTUS HUNG JAKE SPOON.

I finished House, season 5, with my mom today, but I ALSO knew sex with Cuddy was going to happen and consequently that it was a hallucination because GOOGLE SATAN TOLD ME SO. Then I had to pretend that I totes hadn’t seen it coming while my mom was all “OMG WHAAAT”. My fingers make unrepentant sinners.

Oops, I hope I didn’t spoil anyone. But according to sources, I’m so slow the earth had darn went spun out under me, so everyone should’ve already known Augustus hung Jake Spoon and sex with Cuddy wasn’t sex with Cuddy and that dear, sweet George O’Malley… *psychotic breakdown*

Also, I read Max (James Patterson) and last few pages, they had a preview of the manga version of the series AND MAX WAS STANDING AT THE WINDOW IN A SPAGHETTI TOP AND PANTIES. WHEN J. PATZ SPENDS LIKE, EVERY 5 PAGES IN THE NOVEL REMINDING US THAT MAX IS A TOMBOY IN DIRTY JEANS AND SMELLY TEES. Then I remembered that manga is a pseudonym for little boy porn, where girls have Pam-Anderson breasts, Cathie-Jung waists, and eyes the size of my grandma’s dinner plates. Boys of questionable gender and floppy purple hair may also be present. DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW THIS MUCH IS TRUE.

I’m aware that there are people out there doing body shots while I’m sitting here, pecking at the keyboard in my pajamas. I’m so boring it’s boring, omg.

P.S. Not that I think people getting ass-drunk is the epitome of coolness, future kids of mine. OMG I AM BORING AND A PRUDE. I’M A BORING PRUDE.

Where the lovelight gleams

Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays, everyone! I’m excited for the Christmas movies tomorrow *jiggle*. Hallmark, don’t fail me.

I accompanied my mother to the court on Tuesday, and witnessed stupidity in the form of a defense lawyer. But like every occupation, there’s the red wine and there’s the diluted grape juice, so I won’t judge.

I just had fried eggs with ketchup; so good I forgot my name. Burp.

(MY LOVE FOR GINGERBREAD IS GREAT.)

Will you be my love among the fields of barley?

I watched A Christmas Carol the other day in 3D. HA HA HA HA HA COME CLOSER. HA HA HA HA HA TAKE MY ROBE. HA HA HA HA HA. HA HA HA HA. The snow was pretty though.

David Archuleta covered Five For Fighting’s The Riddle (You and I) ♥! That song’s second on my iTunes Top 25. Right after Paris Hilton’s Nothing In This World, HA HA HA HA.

Weather’s really hot today (and yesterday). Late last night I opened my bathroom door and got hit in the face by this wall of heat, no exaggeration.

Psstt. Who’s going to, um, watch New Moon and wouldn’t mind me tagging along? HA HA HA HA *headdesk*.

I woke up early to baby blue eyes from the fire

So… I can do anything I want right now! Without having to look over my shoulder for any signs of a deadline! And that really ought to come accompanied by some kind of wow but I’m getting nothing, even after a week (it doesn’t take away from the exciting times ahead though, mind you, EXCITING TIMES! \o/). I think it’s probably because I’ve always done whatever anyway; the length of my attention span has never complemented my super-ego’s priorities, lmao. /o\

In other failures, I still haven’t gotten off my ass to go put up the Christmas tree. This current situation is very similar to last year’s, whereupon the outcome was the unfortunate absence of a fake fir tree on the merry morn of December 25th. Am I witnessing the birth of an overdetermined plot? D: Here, have 2007’s tree.